Who knows where this will go?

(I've got a message on my heart and it has been ruminating in my brain for the last couple days.  I have no idea how this will come out or where this will go, so bear with me.)

We are in our eighth, almost ninth, week of being a trans-racial foster family with three biological children and two foster children.  It just so happens, the children that have been led to our door happen to have skin colors that do not match with ours and so we are identified as being a trans-racial family quite quickly.  You see, when we were asked what preferences we had in whom we would be willing to foster and/or adopt, my husband and I felt confident that we needed only a couple criteria met.  We communicated that the children should probably be 6 or under so that we could keep a relatively similar birth order to what we currently have in our home.  I am told by a close friend who is my family psychology go-to person (and working on her Ph.D. in Psychology already having a Masters in Social Work...she's got the credentials and knowledge, y'all) that this is smart--she states that the data supports keeping with a similar birth order that already exists in a family when adopting because this helps, rather than hinders, the adjusting family dynamic for the most part (disregarding those aggravating statistical outliers).  When prompted to provide preferences, we also stated that with already having three biological children, we did not feel that a placement of a child with severe physical disabilities with us would be best for the sake of both that child and considering the level of disruption that our family could handle.  However, outside of those criteria, we had no preference for religion, culture, location of origin, race, demographic background, if they were blind, if they had learning disabilities, if they were born already addicted to substances, or gender.  This point is important but bear with me as I set the stage a little more for the message God is reverberating in my heart.

As I look at the five children living in our home, there are so many emotions that mix together in my heart.  As they quietly play without any arguing (for those brief two minutes), when they voice (with whatever level of communication is developmentally appropriate) that they want to be cuddled, when I am able to scratch their backs, scratch their arms, scratch their heads, rub their backs, and stroke their cute little cheeks, and when we sing or dance or read together, my heart is overflowing with that ooey-gooey emotional love feeling that makes it feel so good to be their (foster) mom.  When they are arguing, it has hit that really difficult time of day between snack time and dinner time before John has come home, when one of the children has gone to time out for the umpteenth time, when there is screaming and gnashing of teeth at bedtime, and when my patience is running super thin, there are feelings of frustration and doubt.  When I watch one be kind to another, one teach another something they have learned, when I hear them pray or say the blessing, when I hear them use the manners John and I have taught them to use, and when I see them excel at reaching a goal they have set their minds to, my heart is filled with pride.  There are so many other emotions--so many in fact, that at the end of the day they culminate into exhaustion.  However, I was not prepared for one emotion that I have felt over eight to nine weeks and that I am still learning to deal with.  In foster/adoptive parent training (MAPP), they warned us about this emotion.  They said we would encounter it especially when the world outside of our immediate family did not quite understand the situation, our family, did not know us, or had their own baggage or internal battles to deal with when considering our foster/adoptive parenting journey.  My final emotion that I battle with is anger.  To be honest, this one snuck/sneaked (I will leave it up to the grammar police) up on me.  Anger likes to rear its ugly head when I see people give our family disapproving looks (not the innocent curious ones--there is a difference), when it feels like perhaps all seven of our children are all not being treated equally, when communication with John and I may convey that maybe someone thinks that this is all just temporary and they should not worry with getting attached to our two foster babies, and when others treat us as if we are ignorant. I want you to hear me, I recognize that sometimes this anger may be irrational because people just do not get it, that the two babies may return to their parent one day, that people may be protecting their own hearts, and that in a lot of ways, John and I are still ignorant.  God is sanctifying us in this experience (as He is in all of our challenging life experiences) in an uncomfortable let-Me-teach-you-what-grace-looks-like kind of way.  He is also reminding us to be confident in where He has led us.

Where are you going with this, Melissa?  I say all of this to now say, that John and I are not worried with whether or not the world agrees or disagrees with transracial fostering or adoption, we do not worry with whether others' baggage keeps them from getting close to our family, while we do need to be more attentive to self-care these days, we are not worried about having enough energy and love for all of the babies in our home, we do not believe in withholding love in fear that we will not have enough to pour out later, we are not worried about getting attached only to watch these two babies return to their parent, we are seeking resources to become better educated (thank you authors, bloggers and Facebook support groups), and we are walking with God every day to get better at living out this life that He has raised us to live.  In so many ways, John and I are very different (John - INTP, Melissa - ESFJ...need I say more?)--however, in the most important way, we are the same.  We love Jesus.  When I say we love Him, I mean, we love Him in a reckless abandonment kind of way.  We did not enter this journey of adding to our family through fostering and/or adopting because we wanted to be good people but because we love HIM and He has commanded us to love others. Simply, John and my approach to fostering and adoption is a Gospel-centered approach.  We started this walk trusting in God, His very clear messages to His children, and we continue to abide in Him every day so that we may receive discernment, Holy rest, wisdom, His agape love, His conviction, His forgiveness His grace, His mercy, and His sacrifice so that we can turn around and pour out those things on others.  In fact, in the days that I feel like I have nothing left to give, I usually remember that it was a day that He and I had not had some quality time.  He is so faithful.

What does this Gospel-centered approach to fostering and adopting look like for us?

Denying fleshly categories and seeing ourselves and others in Christ

In Christ, our identity is not tied to color of skin, our culture, our ethnic background, the region of the world or country we are from, or whether or not we are Gentiles.  How could we possibly deny loving others and adopting them into our home when God lavished His grace on us, adopted us into His sonship through Jesus' blood?  God sought to bring us into unity through Him and so to categorize or deny love (intentionally or not) toward others based on fleshly categories is just that, of the flesh.  We choose to be one with the Holy Spirit.

Ephesians 1: 4-14
"For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love
he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us. With all wisdom and understanding, he made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, to be put into effect when the times reach their fulfillment—to bring unity to all things in heaven and on earth under Christ. In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, in order that we, who were the first to put our hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory. And you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory."

Jesus is the firstborn of many brothers

Family is not about who is related through the inheritance of traits, who grew up in the same household, lineage, and most importantly, who was born by the same mother and/or the same father.  In Christ, it does NOT MATTER who is born to whom as long as we are reborn in Him.  In our family, there is no stranger or foreigner.  Our doors are spread wide to receive those who Christ has led us to or led to our door.  There are no tribes, tongues, nations, or languages that will be turned away.  Christ freely adopted us into His family and so we freely welcome others. Most beautifully, when we choose Christ after He so graciously chose us, we become the Church--a united body in Christ. Also, by the way, God does not just welcome us in a earthly hospitable way.  John and I cannot fathom the idea of welcoming children into our home and then just politely passing the time working to just meet their basic needs until they return to their parent--how unholy that seems to us!  When we became fellow citizens of God, it did not come without a price! God made an ultimate sacrifice, there was suffering, Christ was pressed until he sweat blood, there were temptations, there were oh so many hardships!  To follow Christ meant denying everything about oneself to follow Him.  When children come into our home--and I hope when you come into our home--we hope to lavish just a fraction of the love on you that we have been given in Christ.  We know that we are sacrificing, we recognize it is uncomfortable, and y'all, it is hard some days.  I have a chair in the corner of my room that has become a meeting place for God and I that has included some ugly tears.  It is hard.  But so was sacrificing One's son, so was pressing onward knowing that One's life was to be the sacrifice for the world, so was taking up the cross, so was feeling foresaken even for only a moment.  Jesus set a radical example that we are trying to live out and teach our children to live out...all of our children, that is.

Ephesians 2: 17-22

"He came and preached peace to you who were far away and peace to those who were near. For through him we both have access to the Father by one Spirit. Consequently, you are no longer foreigners and strangers, but fellow citizens with God’s people and also members of his household, built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, with Christ Jesus himself as the chief cornerstone. In him the whole building is joined together and rises to become a holy temple in the Lord. And in him you too are being built together to become a dwelling in which God lives by his Spirit."

Hebrews 13: 11-16

"The high priest carries the blood of animals into the Most Holy Place as a sin offering, but the bodies are burned outside the camp. And so Jesus also suffered outside the city gate to make the people holy through his own blood. Let us, then, go to him outside the camp, bearing the disgrace he bore. For here we do not have an enduring city, but we are looking for the city that is to come.  Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise—the fruit of lips that openly profess his name. And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased."

To withhold from the least of these is to turn away Jesus

In the parable of the Sheep and the Goats in Matthew 25, Jesus instructs his disciples that they should seek to serve by providing food to the hungry, water to the thirsty, a home to a stranger, clothes to those in need, care for those who are sick and visit those in prison.  He goes on to say that by doing these things for the "least of these" we are doing these things for Him.  But in our home, we believe this parable should be taken a step further than its literal meaning.  Of course we are providing the basic physical needs--all children have full bellies, are fully hydrated, are clothed (even when they would not prefer it), are given warm beds, and are provided medical care when sick.  In fact, when they are in time out, we even visit them and release them eventually (that was kind of a joke...you can laugh).  More than physical needs, we also believe that Jesus is calling us to feed them with biblical Truth, start them with pure spiritual milk, surround them in a home that has God's promises written on the walls and that raises them to grow in wisdom and in stature and in favor with God and man, that teaches them to rest in the Holy Spirit, that clothes them in righteousness as well as in the armor of God, that teaches them that we are all sick and needy of the One True God, and that without Him, we are imprisoned in the flesh.  We believe both physical and spiritual needs must be met--no matter who they are or what they look like or where they came from or what obstacles may stand in our way.  God just did not flippantly entrust these children to us as parents.  His trust carries a weight of responsibilities.

Matthew 25: 31-46

“When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his glorious throne. All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left."
“Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’
“Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’
“The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’
“Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’
“They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’
 “He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’
“Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.”

If you are still with me and still reading, I have never promised to be concise. I think about the lyrics of "Light the Fire"...."I stand to praise you, but I fall on my knees. My spirit is willing, but my flesh is so weak. So light a fire, in my weary soul!  Fan the flame, make my spirit whole!  Lord you know, just where I've been so light the fire in my heart again!"  We do not get all of this right 100% of the time, but by the grace of God, He makes our spirit whole which allows for us to repent and work on getting it right next time.  My prayer for us and for the world is that we would find our identities in Christ, we would look to our right and our left and we would see others the way that Jesus sees them, we would not withhold any love, grace or mercy for them, and that we would all unite together to feed the spiritually hungry whether that means bringing them into our home to share the gospel or sacrificing something of the flesh for that person's eternal reward. Jesus does not call for us to marginalize, hold back, hide Him, or be greedy. 

Mark 12: 30-31

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’There is no commandment greater than these.”

[By the way, I love this post as well if you have the time to read it.]

It takes a whole village to raise a child.

"It takes a whole village to raise a child."

---

"This Igbo and Yoruba (Nigeria) proverb exists in different forms in many African languages. The basic meaning is that child upbringing is a communal effort. The responsibility for raising a child is shared with the larger family (sometimes called the extended family). Everyone in the family participates especially the older children, aunts and uncles, grandparents, and even cousins. It is not unusual for African children to stay for long periods with their grandparents or aunts or uncles. Even the wider community gets involved such as neighbors and friends. Children are considered a blessing from God for the whole community. This communal responsibility in raising children is also seen in the Sukuma (Tanzania) proverb "One knee does not bring up a child" and in the Swahili (East and Central Africa) proverb "One hand does not nurse a child."

In general this Nigerian proverb conveys the African worldview that emphasizes the values of family relationships, parental care, self-sacrificing concern for others, sharing, and even hospitality. This is very close to the Biblical worldview as seen in scripture texts related to unity and cooperation (Ecclesiastes 4:9,12) and a mother's self-sacrificing love (Isaiah 49:15-16)." (Click here for the resource.)

---

This proverb has been near and dear to my heart ever since children began entering our home. In fact, upon settling in amongst other believers at our church who also had young children and were approximately the same age as us, we were approached one day and told that we had to come up with a new Sunday School class name because a younger group needed to be referred to as the "Young Adult Class."  After we let the shock of that moment pass (because none of use have moved on from age 29, for goodness sake!), we decided to call ourselves "The Village."  

Our family is so blessed to be a part of a village who loves our children and loves John and I fiercely. Our village includes our family of grandparents, parents, aunts, uncles, and cousins.  It also includes close friends, their children, their parents, our church family, our neighbors and our community.  I understand that in other cultures, people leave their doors open so that others in the village can move in and out of the homes visiting and living amongst one another.  When I heard that, I first felt sad that the majority of Americans keep our doors closed and locked--but then I thought about how open our door really is, honestly.  There are very few days each week that we do not have visitors welcomed into our home rather through physical visits, phone calls, texts, messages, etc.  We are connected and while our physical door may be closed sometimes, it is wide open to receive our village or move out to support others in our village.  

I am feeling incredibly emotional and sentimental when John and I envision many of your faces and what you all have meant to us and our family these last few weeks especially.  We see so many of you who reached out to arrange delivering or allowing for us to pick up the physical necessities of clothes, strollers, booster seats, diapers, hair products, shoes, etc; we see the faces of those who came over and helped go through all of the items we received to divide, wash and arrange the clothes; we see the cards, gift cards, and notes you have signed encouraging and supporting us, we see the faces and the hands of those of you who prepared food and brought it to our doorstep to lessen the chaos of the dinner hour or to provide us a sweet treat; we see so many of you who have cuddled, encouraged, complimented, and exchanged a kind word with all five of the children; we hear the offers to keep one to all five of the children for us; we see you who have already watched one to five children so that we can run to appointments, get some rest, or get work accomplished; we have seen your faces of concern as you have reached out to John and I to check on our current condition; we see the hands working in our daughters' hair or the notes sent with encouraging suggestions all with the purpose of supporting me and helping them to feel beautiful; we see the looks of grace and mercy as we have forgotten to get back to you, complete a task or if we just seem too tired to carry a conversation; we see you sacrificing your time to make time for us, and most importantly, we feel your prayers....so, so many prayers.

We absolutely love our village.  We wouldn't trade you all for any earthly possessions.  God has always intended on His children to surround one another so that all of His children could love, support, hold accountable, and encourage one another.

You all have been standing by us, encouraging us, helping rear our children, have shared your physical possessions, your emotional concern, and prayerful hearts with us, and you are blessing us in so many ways. While we don't always love accepting help because we feel others need it more, we are finding that God doesn't call us to be proud but delights in our humbleness and openness to allow for Him to provide for our needs.  You are the hands and feet of God to us.  Thank you for your love, encouragement and obedience to helping us raise our children.

(If you are reading this and do not have a village...we invite you to be part of ours. Send me a message--we want to pray for you, support you, encourage you, and love you too!)

Bringing home twin toddlers....

So, OK, I didn't just give birth nor are the toddlers a set of twins, but when I describe what our week has felt like, the phrase "it feels like I just gave birth to twin toddlers and have just brought them home" seems to describe the experience pretty well.  I remember each time we added children to our family, there was a time of many different emotions, exhaustion, transition for everyone in the household and trying to find a new normal.  That's where we are.

Our week has been consumed with developing boundaries for our two little ones, responding to the testing that toddlers like to put adults through, making time to ensure that each child in our house knows that they are valued, loved, and have a voice, growing attachments that would resemble a Partin web of love, and having many, MANY appointments. I've learned about certain programs for government assistance, watched hours of mama's hair regimens on YouTube, have raced against time while removing soiled sheets, washing, and replacing the same sheets in record time to help one of our lovies avoid shame, have learned both the beauty of receiving "I love you" through giving birth versus earning "I love you" through earning trust, have played referee in numerous sharing showdowns, have found myself to be appropriately dressed yet becoming the center of attention in WalMart (maybe natural curiosity, maybe approval and awe, maybe disapproval...whatever), have been laughed at when not knowing what hair grease was, have received more hugs and kisses per day than I think I ever have before, have juggled home-school, teaching school, teaching online, and mothering five kids, have washed on average 3 loads of laundry a day,.....and all the while feeling like our family has been bathed in prayer.

I made the comment to my mother tonight, and I feel it with every fiber of my being, "I would rather love fiercely and experience loss than to never have loved at all." All five children in our home are our children.  We are referred to both as Mommy and Daddy and Mommy Melissa and Daddy John.  I get emotional when I think about how beautifully God expands our hearts with every child that is added to our family.  My heart is full while my emotions exhausted. We are considered a pre-adoptive family but my prayer is still for the family of the littlest ones.  We are getting attached....we are hopeful that those who love us will get attached.  We are hopeful that you will join us in loving all of our children when you have a chance to interact with our family. There is no us and them anymore....there is just us. We are resting both on cloud 9 and dead asleep in our beds each night. It is wonderful and overwhelming.

This is from where I draw my strength:

2 Corinthians 12: 9-10  
"But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

We are saved by grace...it is because of love poured out by Christ on the cross that we have been saved...we love because we are loved and because Christ loves all.  We do not worry about what others may say, think, or worry about because we know where God has led us, we are happily obedient to His commandment to love, and we rest in the fact that He is a God of provision.  We choose to love, be obedient, trust that he will provide the strength, rest, and meet our physical, emotional, and spiritual needs in every season of this journey for every one of us. When we are weak and feeling defeated, we stand on the promise that these are the moments that God will shine. 

For those asking how you can continue to support our family, we again ask that you love each of the five of our children the same showing not one favor over the other, that you give us grace if we drop one of the many balls we are juggling in the air, that you use encouraging words, and that you pray for our family as well as the family of the little ones and the social workers involved. We are happy. We are exhausted.  That is all.

Just helping me do a little laundry!

Princess Captain America is here to save the day!

Jesus really loves the children!

A few years ago, I read "Heaven is for Real" and there is one statement that stands out in my mind.  Three year old Colton gains his life and health after a tragic illness that sent him to death and begins to vocalize his experience in Heaven--he repeatedly states to his parents, "Jesus really loves the children." As I spend time reading God's Word, I see that statement resonate in the scriptures while it deepens in my heart.  I have always loved children--God created me to be a teacher and a mother and I have no doubts of that.  I remember conversations that John and I would have early on in our relationship where we would dream of one day adopting children.  We always felt like adoption would be something we would do but came to a consensus that it would happen once we had finished having biological children, God willing.  So, if you know me, you know that once I gave birth to Gabe, I obsessively started researching adoption.  We felt like Gabe had made our biological family complete and I was ready to look ahead to the children we would welcome into our home.  My research led us to conversations about adopting from other nations, adopting from Jamaica after our mission trips there, and adopting locally. However, in all of those conversations, John would politely dismiss my impatient "we-have-to-do-it-right-now" suggestions. I have always trusted John to be the discerning body in this family--he has a patience that I dream of attaining some day.  So, either because I was tired of being dismissed OR because I trusted John's patience and discernment (let's go with the latter), I dropped the idea of adoption and continued to focus on raising our three littles, teaching, and growing in faith.

Last spring, however, adoption came back up.  I don't remember exactly if it was John or I that brought it up, but what I DO remember is that John said that it was the right time.  We had been watching a couple families in our circle foster and adopt and we realized that God had revealed to us the direction we would take in this adoption journey.  We contacted Randolph County Department of Social Services, signed up for MAPP classes, and made arrangements to be trained every Thursday for three hours for 10 weeks. We asked for close friends to pray for us, John and I agreed that we would regroup after each training to discern if God was continuing to lead us forward, and we prayed a prayer of obedience to follow Him knowing that He would watch over our family.  Every week, when listening to details of the various levels and types of abuse, the manners in which children act out in response to the abuse and neglect, the expectations of our time and our hearts, what it means to conduct shared parenting with the birth parents, and the expectations of our parenting, I had two thoughts that would run through my mind: 1) How did anyone ever let me take my children home from the hospital without this training AND 2) Jesus really loves the children.  We began the training process with ten families and found ourselves one of three families at the end of the training.

We had been in the process of waiting for our foster/adoptive family profile and application to be reviewed and approved until last week when we found out we were approved by the State Board.  On Friday, we received a call.  The social worker informed us that we would definitely be receiving a sibling set that would be placed with us this week. It is difficult to express the emotions that we feel as parents.  We are joyful that God is entrusting us to love these children for however long they are placed with us, but we are also saddened that the family involved will be experiencing such a difficult loss--this week may be one of the worst weeks of their lives.

We have trusted God to rule over our lives but have specifically asked for Him to take control of this journey--we don't want to try to control any of it.  Our children and these children are ultimately His children.  We continue to walk by faith and the provision He has already blessed us with, the network of support of our family and friends, and the peace that passes all understanding is overwhelming to us.

Matthew 22: 37-39 states "And he (Jesus) said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself."  God sacrificed His most precious and only Son so that redemption could be ours. We expect that our lives will be turned upside down in this transition and in finding a new normal--but we question how could we not be willing to sacrifice a little to love our neighbor through loving their children as an expression of attempting to return the love God has for us.  We are not "good people," we are sinners who seek God each and every day with the ultimate desire of our heart to serve Him so that others may see Him and choose the redemption that has already been paid for them.  Our prayer is that any and all who do not know Christ in this process will find Him, that seeds will be planted in the hearts of these babies as long as we have them and are able to "train them up as they should go," that our children will witness what it means to see faith in action, and that God will sanctify us making us more pleasing to Him.  We are honored to be obedient and even more honored that this obedience includes loving little children.  We hope you will walk this journey with us in prayer.

(Some photos in our preparation...)

The room is ready!

Practicing my skills with some new hair styles!

A full house to a fuller house four years later...

Ok, so I know--the title of this post is probably a little corny, maybe over-used right now or whatever, but when I typed in the web address of our blog, I realized that the last time I posted was before Gabe was born!  What the what??  I guess when we added a third child, our lives became so busy that this was what got laid down.  So, just in case you are not getting my excessive Instagram or Facebook status and photo posts about the cutest kids in the world, here is what has transpired since February 6, 2012.

• We gave birth to a very healthy Gabriel who has been a spirited, jovial, stubborn, and beautiful blessing from God.  We can not imagine what life would be like without him making us laugh, giving us his "best hugs," ordering us around, fighting to redefine what it means to be the youngest, and putting the m-a-n in the term "little man." 
• I achieved earning my National Board Certification in Teaching Young Adult Science.
• I have changed teaching jobs a couple times which has been challenging, rewarding, and such a learning experience.  However, we are now settling down this year into homeschooling Meredith in second grade, Nora in kindergarten, and Gabe in Pre-K.
• Speaking of which, yes, we now homeschool our children.  There are so many reasons that we have decided to do this and I feel like this will make for a blog post in of itself--so stay tuned.
• John is growing in his position with the Department of Transportation--yet another area that God is working out.
• We have been to and from Jamaica for mission trips with our church family at PRFM. 
• We have accomplished many projects around the house and as I look around, I see our thumbprint in every corner.  I love how our house is lived in, reflects our style, speaks of our faith, welcomes us to gather closely, and entertains our dear family and friends.
• Lucy (the dog) is now 11 years old and we have a little 8 month old Chihuahua named Chloe who became a member of our family for Meredith (but becomes my little baby after bedtime).  
• We have taken a prayerful and timely journey into becoming a foster/adoptive family, have received our license, and are receiving our first placement this week.

So referring back to that final bullet point, our new journey in being foster/adoptive parents is what has spurred the resurrection of this blog.  My pastor/friend recommended that I start to journal this experience and while I considered journaling privately, I realized that I am more of a transparent person and that this foster/adoptive experience is not mine to own alone.  Many of you are taking this walk of faith and obedience with us and I thought it would be fitting that we share an appropriate amount of details and insight in this manner (yes, I do know how to walk the line of too much information despite what our family/friend peanut gallery may believe).  I invite you to read The Partin Family Blog (ed. 2016) as we reflect on parenting all of the children in our home, adopting, homeschooling, working, serving, living, and loving all in the name of the Lord. 

I leave you with this chorus of the blog post titled theme song...it just seems fitting in this season of our lives.  

(Chorus:)
Everywhere you look,
Everywhere you go
There's a heart
(There's a heart)
A hand to hold onto.
Everywhere you look,
Everywhere you go
There's a place,
Of somebody who needs you
Everywhere you look.

When you're lost out there and you're all alone,
A LIGHT is waiting to carry you home.
Everywhere you look.
Everywhere you look.

We're getting there!

So, we are getting closer to our due date of February 25th and I decided it was high time that I post about our progress! By the way, I am totally going to skip Thanksgiving and Christmas postings because the thought of working backwards completely overwhelms me. Just know that we had a great holiday season with sweet family and friends. The girls were happy, we are happy, and the reason for the season was taught and kept in mind the whole time. Amen.
Anyway, back to Baby Boy P (as we like to call him--his name is a secret!). He is growing and is perfectly healthy. He is probably more active than Meredith and Nora and I have a feeling he may have the same long limbs as Meredith. We did have a scare this week thinking I was becoming preeclampsic again (I had it with Meredith and was on the verge of having it with Nora). However, tests came in today to say that while my numbers on my tests are high, we are not in danger zone yet. So keep cookin' Baby Boy! :) I am currently dilated 2 1/2cm dilated and 80% effaced so we will see when he decides to come! Things are progressing! We have, for the most part, finished his nursery and it is an adorable planes, trains, and automobiles theme with the use of soft, primary colors (pictures to be posted once he arrives due to the fact that his name hangs in his room).
Keep posted and we will do our best to post more often, especially in light of his arrival! Go ahead and let us know if you have any ideas of what we will name him. I will give the hint that we hope to not have much of a problem to find things that have his initials on them! Hmmm....what could that name be?
Here is a picture of the girls this past month--they are growing way too fast!

















Playing at the Greensboro Childrens' Museum

Cool Nora playing at home just after waking up!

















Dancing with their Daddy! :)

The Cutest Little Lady Bugs in the land!

This Halloween, we had a great time celebrating as a family! We kicked off the season with a trip to the pumpkin patch to pick the two most perfect pumpkins! Meredith had a great time running from pumpkin to pumpkin deciding which one was the "perfect" one. Nora just enjoyed running, patting a pumpkin, running again, and patting another. It was a beautiful day and we so enjoyed it!

John was able to take the girls to a Fall Festival at a local church while I was out of town one weekend spending the day with my mother. The girls had a blast! In addition, when John and I were out of town, Elaine, Aunt Anna Ruth, and Baylee took the girls to another church that was having a Fall Festival which the girls thoroughly enjoyed.

The days leading up to Halloween, we carved pumpkins for the first time as a family. We kind of skipped it up until now because we felt like Meredith really wouldn't enjoy it--this year, Meredith LOVED it. She especially liked holding the carving knife along with John and I to cut out the jack-o-lantern's face. She refused to take out the insides at first but finally warmed up to taking out ONE seed. (I have some great photos from this, but the photo card is malfunctioning, thus, you will have to enjoy a picture of the finished product.) We also made some Halloween-themed, chocolate covered pretzel rods in which Meredith is still enjoying for dessert!

On Halloween night, the girls suited up in their lady bug costumes provided by their Nana and we enjoyed our friends and new church family at Poplar Ridge Friends Meeting for a fun-filled night. We ate hot dogs, decorated cookies with icing, sprinkles, and the ever-important candy corn. Meredith was given a paper that she had to fill with stickers by playing games at each station. She especially loved the "bobbing for ducks" pond and the sailboat race. She refused to get her face painted or get fake tatoos--what does this mean, exactly? Nora really had a great time at the "animal match-up" carpet and just taking everything in. At the end of the festival, the kids lined up, went down a row of wooden houses with very little doors, and knocked on each door to go "trick-or-treating". We had a great holiday and look forward to Thanksgiving soon! As our family grows, our holidays seem to get more and more special!